The Competition

This guy is trying to muscle in on my territory. He's all, I'm five thousand years old, come look at my frozen, whipworm infected corpse. I have fancy shoes and a grass cloak. I'm not worried though. He doesn't have my sexy hair. Chicks dig the hair.


You all should come to my band's show tonight at Kiva Han. We'll be rocking out to all of your favorite tunes, including our soon-to-go-platinum single, "The Gun is Aqua: What Color is the Tie?!"

If all goes well, we may whip out some songs from our upcoming experimental album, Bog Soup.

That's tonight at 8:00 (opening band, Serif Deathmatch, at 7:30), $5 at the door.